@Yael

[weaseled]

@yael

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[tablescraps]

Being cared for is a privilege.

( And it's one people can revoke, or choose to never give. He didn't understand people were caring for him; and, even then, he doesn't recognize how to treat himself in accordance to that. )

It's okay, that you don't forgive me. Tell me if there's something you want me to do, but... I'll try to change, regardless.

[weaseled]

That doesn't mean you're undeserving of it, you clown.

[So long as Mithrun makes an earnest effort to care for himself, that isn't a privilege Yael will revoke.]

All I want you to do is try. Making an effort is more than enough. I'm not saying you need to succeed.

[Sometimes taking that very first step is the hardest part. Yael knows that from experience.]

[tablescraps]

( clown......???? )

If you're sure. It might still be frustrating to watch. But, I'm trying things as they come up. Like thinking what someone else would do in a situation.

( Now... overcoming the barrier of his lack of desire to copy someone is something he'll need to surmount, but maybe he'll get into a routine of it eventually, such that automatic habit offsets lack of desire to act. )

[weaseled]

I can deal with frustrating. What I can't deal with is you giving up by default.

[He understands that Mithrun struggles, and while Yael doesn't care to hear the more personal details... he can relate, if nothing else, and offer Mithrun some guidance by way of his own experiences.]

I know it's difficult. I know it feels pointless. But the more you try, the more you'll succeed bit by bit. When you finally taste success, you'll develop a taste for it.

Basically... don't give up just yet. If you've tried everything and none of it sticks, then you can call it quits, but not before then.

[tablescraps]

( Oh, he thinks he gets what Yael was frustrated with a little better now.

There's a longer gap than usual before the reply comes. )

Okay. I'll keep trying, rather than just try.

( Continuous tense! )

Should I still not say thank you?

[weaseled]

Good. And remember that you're doing this for you, not for anyone else.

[Maybe he'll forgive Mithrun... Maybe...!]

Thanks are fine, but don't thank me for anything stupid. Caring about you is a given.

[tablescraps]

( Mithrun can be patient, even if Yael chooses not to forgive him in the end. )

I see. I'm not used to it, but I'll remmeber that.

The people here are friendly. I don't dislike it.

[weaseled]

You'll get there. Practice makes perfect, as they say.

There are plenty of good, kind people in the world, but you've got to look for them. Remember that.

[tablescraps]

( "remmeber"... what's the point of autocorrect if it corrects your words wrong :'(... )

You have a lot of good advice.

[weaseled]

[automistakes..............]

I've made a lot of mistakes in my life. If you can benefit from what I've learned the hard way, you can spare yourself some pain in the longrun.

[tablescraps]

( truly

Some pause. )

Would you be irate if I made a mistake, despite your advice?

[weaseled]

Irate? Nah. Making mistakes means you're actively trying, right?

[That said, this is Mithrun. Yael can imagine him making mistakes without trying, but his point stands.]

[tablescraps]

( Mithrun considers this view quite optimistic. )

I guess. There's something right now I don't really understand.

There's someone I know who's really cheery and friendly. He's touchy. He'd like holding me and holding my hand. He was always complimenting me and how I look. He said he treats everyone he's friends with like that. He'd also say I was different. But he'd also say we were just friends. I don't know why, but it was starting to frustrate me. Even though he was transparent.

I think he has a partner now. He was always talking about how he wanted someone who wanted to be with him. I don't know for sure, but I think I know them... He was drunk in their guild hall, on the steps, and I put him in a bed. Then he started holding me like he would, and he started getting touchier than usual. I said he could do what he wanted.

I think I made a mistake... Right?

[weaseled]

[...The more Mithrun describes the man, the clearer an image Mithrun paints of him in his head. No, it can't be that man.....................]

Sounds like Justin. [Sorry Justy.] You really do have peculiar tastes.

[tablescraps]

Justy. Does it sound like I like him?

[weaseled]

It sounds like a crush to me, but let me get something straight here first.

He doesn't seem like the type of guy who'd use anyone. Too spacey. But you let a guy who might or might not have a partner touch you?

[tablescraps]

( Doesn't seem the type... :0 (Mithrun who doesn't understand basic qualities about other people.) )

Yes. I didn't really want him to stop.

( Which is similar to, but just slightly different than, "I didn't have the desire to stop him," which is technically true, but... )

[weaseled]

[Good answer, Mithrun. "I didn't have the desire to stop him" would've had Yael leaving him on read.]

And let's say he for sure has a partner. Do you care if he's cheating on them with you?

I'm not asking about morals here. I'm asking you if that bothers you at all.

[tablescraps]

( A small gold star! Very small.

This one he has to think about. Objectively, sure, it's bad to cheat on your partner. Objectively, also, you don't really want a relationship with someone apparently fine with cheating on their partner, either. But, divorced of morality and common sense... )

No. It doesn't really bother me. Though... with him, I guess I don't really like that he might have gone back to someone else, after.

( He isn't bothered with any cheater getting handsy with him, honestly. It's whatever. But he doesn't like the idea of Tylor, specifically, using him as a side piece (in this hypothetical scenario). Apparently, he'd rather homewreck. )

[weaseled]

[Eh, Yael gets it. Mithrun wants to have his cake and eat it too, but he'd dislike it if someone took that cake away from him even if Mithrun were the one who stole it in the first place.

For what it's worth, Yael appreciates his honesty even if he doesn't agree with Mithrun. Progress for them both.]

There's a good chance he'll lose interest if he's got someone already. Cheaters usually go out, sleep around, and return to their partners afterward. There's comfort in familiarity, etc.

But that's supposing the guy has a partner after all. Maybe he's talking about his tamagotchi or his dumb pet potato. Have you asked him if he's single?

[tablescraps]

That's true.

( He does know cheaters aren't really good partners for a reason. And yet... )

Before that, he did talk like he was single. He said he only does certain intimate things with people he loves. When I met him at the guild, he was covered in hickeys... Is it weird to assume?

[weaseled]

Sounds like the person he slept with plays the game too. Friends with benefits, probably, but that raises another question.

If he's the type to sleep around, he might not be looking for a committed relationship. Someone like you would be happier in one, don't you think?

[tablescraps]

( Gap in reply. )

I think so.

But I don't know if I'd like being in love again. If that's what this would lead to. I don't know if it's a good feeling.

[weaseled]

It's good and it's bad. Love's complicated like that.

But some of my happiest days were with my ex. I'd rather keep those good memories and deal with the pain than have never been happy at all.

What do you think? Would the tradeoff be worth it to you?

[tablescraps]

( He's really thinking on this, this is his first day at emotions school pls )

I think I might need to change, first, before I can be sure. I don't know what I'm like now, but... the last time love hurt, I overreacted.